Want to Know What is Child Adoption Process in India? Here is a Brief Summary!

I was originally writing a blog post on why a couple do not choose to adopt an orphan child. It turned out that there were countless points I wanted to convey, including this one – Child Adoption Process in India. I believe that getting educated on matters like this will make someone more informed and that would help them stop being ignorant. But I ended up writing loads of stuff and that could not fit in just one article. Practically, yes it could have been, but a typical reader would be easily bored if they see a huge write-up containing like 3000+ words.

Therefore, I thought why not make separate blogs provided that each contains specific content. This can help someone navigate through their area of interest. What I’ve noticed is that people are mostly more into reading sentiments, especially if they know me on personal level. I have shared regular posts like why dairy isn’t as healthy as someone thinks, toxic work culture, feminism/matriarchy, etc. but the readers on these are very few, as opposed to topics like “Aren’t you pregnant yet?”, “Signs you have toxic parents”.

In the same way, it’s unlikely that more people would be reading this one with equal curiosity. But since I already wrote this part and planned to upload, I have to publish it. Certainly, it gave me more knowledge through few days of research I made and I would like to share that with everyone. So, let’s dig deep into child adoption process in India.

Adoption Process in India - Rules, Procedure, and Costs involved

Theoretically, the child adoption process in India is not a difficult process or expensive either. Anybody, married or not, have biological children or not, can adopt a child through CARA (Central Adoption Resource Authority). It is legally a punishable offense by bringing random child to your home without registering through CARA. Any other private agency that promises to help you to adopt, without CARA and its long waiting process, is fraudulent. This is the reason why someone needs to inform the police if they see any missing child on streets or railway stations. This helps them know whether he or she is an orphan or just went missing by accident.

Eligibility Criteria

Any child who is an orphan, abandoned, or surrendered who has been declared free legally by the CWC (Child Welfare Committee) can be adopted. Also, any other child who belongs to a biological relative, living or dead, can also be adopted by other person or a couple, provided that the child is no longer living with either of their parents due to a number of circumstances and is legally free. Any child who hasn’t reached 18 years of age can be put up for adoption.

A single person or a married couple can adopt a child in India. A single woman can adopt a girl or a boy child while a single man can only adopt a boy but not a girl. They should not exceed 45 years (and at least 21 years for singles) of age while registering in CARINGS (a software that contains a database of children available for adoption and parents who register, maintained and managed by CARA). The combined age of a couple should not exceed 90 years (maximum 45 years of each) of age. Also, they should not have more than three biological children, except when an orphan child is physically or mentally handicapped and someone is willing to adopt them despite having multiple children.

Once a couple adopts a boy successfully and they are looking to adopt another child, they cannot adopt another boy, but a girl, and vice versa. This implies that the gender of a child is not allowed to be repeated.

There are no fixed criteria for minimum wage or income but the social worker who is going to visit to the prospective parents’ home will note down the motivation and capability to provide reasonable living standards to the adoptive child. These are the criteria at present that might be subject to change in the future.

Fees

The total fees by CARA are 46,000 INR at present. While registering in CARINGS plus a home study report requires 6000 INR and the rest 40,000 INR is child care corpus fees taken later when choosing a child is almost decided and the prospective parents look forward to bringing the child home. Once brought home, a social worker will visit at the house every 6 months for 2 years. This phase is known as pre-adoption foster care stage.

The process abroad such as in the U.S. is much more expensive. But they do have option of mother choosing a potential couple to take care of her newborn baby once she delivers. This method is not available in India.

Difference between adoptive and foster kids

The main difference between adoptive and foster kids is the permanency where they are settled. The adoptive kids’ parents, once they legally own the child, give him/her all the rights as they would to their biological kid. This is permanent regardless of anyone’s age or existence.

The foster kids are temporary and they keep getting re-settled with different people/couples. In developed countries, some couples take in foster kids as it is a way cheaper method and they do not have to provide them lifetime of care. These kids keep changing homes.

The pre-adoption foster care stage is thus named as “foster” because in any circumstance if the couple and the child do not get along even after talking or counselling then the child is given back for re-settling. He or she will be given to any other couple if the criteria match again.

The NRIs are also eligible to adopt Indian children and they need to follow the same procedure. Register in CARA’s official website and follow the steps. The same rule is applicable for foreign citizens.

Here is the link where you can find more information regarding the entire child adoption process in India by Indians, NRI’s, and foreigners: http://cara.nic.in/

Things to keep in mind if you look forward to adopting

Be sure if adoption is right for you

If you still have doubts even after collecting all the information, maybe adopting someone is not the right path for you. Be firm with your decision. If there are second thoughts already emerging in your mind, focus more on what you truly want. Meditate if need be and clarify your thoughts. The answer will follow you soon through intuition.

Do not consider it is an act of charity, something you expect to get rewards in the concept of “afterlife”

Adoption is not some kind of charity work. You are not doing any favour to a child. You can return them back to orphanage if you do not find them suitable enough. Right after you get a kid, there is a period (2 years) in which they monitor you and the child occasionally to see if everything goes well. Your actions will not be selfless if you expect some form of rewards, in a form of obligation from the kid after they grow up, or by God/universe/Karma. Such viewpoint is meant for disappointment.

Be well informed about the whole adoption procedure, child psychology, physical disability if there is, and trauma

Whichever country you live in, try to find out more and more details regarding the matter. Find out leads from authentic sources, or someone who had gone through this procedure before.

Also, things like mental health and child psychology are important factors. This is because someone who is destined to come to your home wouldn’t be a clean slate but someone who had gone through serious experiences that might alter their way of perception, learning ability, etc. I am not saying all children will be like this, but I am advising to be prepared for such situations, if need be.

I mentioned physical disability because some issues suddenly emerge as the person ages like Muscular Dystrophy, neurological problems, vision troubles, etc. So, even if you opted for a healthy child, nothing guarantees, and you cannot fight CARA later. Again, this isn’t to scare anyone but be mentally prepared if something shows up.

Know that the child could have gender identity/expression and sexual orientation differently than you initially expected

Many people are still not aware of homosexuality and transgenderism. Some children are heterosexual and cisgender and still express reverse form of masculinity or femininity. This means if one is born as a female, identifies as a girl/woman, gets attracted to opposite sex and yet presents herself wearing masculine clothes and accessories. The same goes with males. This is just a fragment of example I have mentioned. There is a whole spectrum that you might want to cover to get more educated through “gender studies”. Again, this could happen to your own offspring, which is normal.

Raise them as you would do to your biological child

Once you start your life with the child, you should be able to love them as your own just as you would with someone you reproduced yourself. It is a sad state of affair that there are parents who are abusive towards their offspring even without their knowledge, treating a non-biological one wouldn’t change such people overnight. I wish such people remain child-free.

Now these are the possibilities of any child, biological or not. If you love the child unconditionally, nothing would matter. It requires time and patience but worth the effort!

Do not judge them for minute things they do or say

There could be instances when a kid might not respond in a way as expected, or have uncontrollable impulses, or does not cooperate at all. Do not think this way – (S)he was born to God-knows-who, (s)he must be having his mother’s or father’s personality traits. This is a negative thinking process. Rather take it this way – it’s a child we are dealing with, they are meant to have occasional mood swings.

Keep them away from toxic people

While growing, all children need a healthy household. So, even if their caretakers make sure that there is enough support, there can be others who they may encounter in family functions. A few lowlife people would not hesitate gossiping about your decision to adopt and will judge the child the way they look or behave. Obviously, children are smart enough to recognise such negative vibes and might feel left out. Now as a parent, your duty is to ensure that such people are not in the periphery, not for long at least.

Talk to immediate or other family members with a hope to get support. If not, consider keeping the child at a distance to avoid toxicity.

Always keep the communication channel open

Parenting is a project of lifetime. Once you have begun to take charge of taking care of kids, you are supposed to always be involved in their life, not in a suffocating way, but in a manner that the child feels safe to open up in front of you on several matters. This avoids future communication gap and negative assumptions about lots of things.

A healthy and functional family does not contain negative attributes, quite opposite of what I have just stated. Sure, conflicts are bound to happen at times but family members are supposed to talk about how they felt about a particular incidence, and not brush it off like ‘forget matters of past’. Other family members can introspect and work on themselves. This method works for long run, be it parent-child or any other relationship.

I know I have covered too much. Even this blog consists of points that are unrelated to the main heading but I really wanted to express on this so I did!